Post-Chanukah, Post-Christmas & Pre-2009

Chanukah 2008 will forever be remembered as the Chanukah I spent Christmas Eve with the Feldman's.  Eyal's family invited me to join in their Christmas Eve Chanukah feast (Chanukah just happened to fall during Christmas this year so the timing was perfect).  To say that this was the best Chanukah ever would not be an over-statement.  Being with Eyal again erased all of the passage of time and he maintains his sense of humor and just good old-fashioned charm that he's always had.  Eyal's family is headed by a matriarch who truly earned the title and the silent, but steadfast, father that got up when we were finished with the meal and began the mandatory fried foods for the evening.  When I talked about this on the air I only said thank you to this family, but behind the gates of Hidden Hills I found a Chanukah miracle - a family that can get together and not argue, one without dysfunction and a lovely and gracious hostess mother.  The siblings as as they always were: beautiful and graceful and the 9-year-old Nathan is going to be a hellion with a lot of Hebrew in him!

Thank you to the Feldman and to Eyal for inviting me to be part of your family gathering.  As I drove home afterw

ards I got to thinking about all of my family gatherings and they just don't have the same feel.  I could blame it on my family being larger and mixed - having a platoon of children under the same roof would make any day chaotic let alone a holiday, but I do remember well how latke seemed to bring us together and my father attempting to keep up with the demands of a large family to start and not even able to do it today because of how fast and large we grew.

Christmas was again one of those times of year that I love and hate at the same time.  I love the smells that come off of a fresh pine tree or wreath, but I hate the crowds of Christmas shopping.  I must say that the crowds do not stop me from making my annual pilgrimage to stores, but this year seemed a little less intense and I easily found parking at a couple of malls and I never found a valet that had the dreaded sign saying that valet was full.  Eyal is pictured on the ground over there because the pictures that he and I have together all have him towering over me - he is 6'7" tall after all.  Not that his family is any different - they're all tall.  I think the 9-year-old is as tall as I am!

I also heard from some of the people I served with while I was in the military. That is always a good thing.

When I think back at the time I spent with people in the 1990s in places like Babenhausen, Germany and the stuff we did there alone with people who I served right here at Camp Pendleton with - it warms my heart to know that people still think of me.  Not that I'm not thought of - I get hate mail all of the time - but it is nice to reminisce about things and I enjoy doing it.  

Granted - when I was in the military I sometimes drank, but I drank substantially less than those I was reminiscing with!  In the picture of Babenhausen (closed and given back to the Germans in 2007) I can tell you where my room was, who lived next to me and the names of all of the people I didn't like.  The ones I did far outnumber them... Pendleton was the same with a few more that I didn't like than were at Babenhausen, but that is an inter-service tradition.  There were other duty stations and posts in between the two but I went from start to finish - maybe I'll fill in the gaps another time.

My personal shopper and the man who puts me together is named Charles and I visited him because I bought four suits from Ermengildo Zegna and one from Armani.  I know it seems pompous to name drop, but a good suit is a good suit and Charles helps dress me.

Frankly, he knows what I want and need before I do and is the only reason that I continue going to Neiman Marcus.  

If he left there would be nothing to keep me because I don't shop at a store because of what they have - most high end stores carry the same stuff - but you can sure use help putting yourself together.  Charles I trust.  I trust him so much that when the phone rings and I see that it is him and he says, "Steve - you'll love what I just got in" or "Steve, we're only getting two of these and this would be perfect to wear with your X, Y or Z" he is the man I trust to take the trusty AMEX and buy it - sometimes weeks before I'll see him again to even try the thing on to be fitted.

For some Christmas and Chanukah was not what it should have been.  The financial woes of Wall Street made it to the cliche of Main Street and that is sad.  What I do not understand is the constant need to beat the drum of bad news.  Isn't it enough that people are feeling a pinch?  Do they need to be reminded that there is a financial crisis every time they turn on the tube.  I don't know about you, but I watch TV for an escape from the days news and events; problems and wars.  I don't turn it on - most of the time - in order to catch up on what I've already read.  Some reports say that this was one of the worst Christmas shopping seasons ever and that even Chanel is laying off workers - a sure sign of financial doom.  

Could it be that Chanel is doing what some of these companies should have done a long time ago by getting rid of excess workers?  The fact that they are opening new Hermes stores in southern CA and that when I went to stores like Louis Vuitton or Barneys they were filled to capacity tells me that someone is shopping.  Those are not the kinds of stores where you just go in to take a peek after all.  At least I don't (I don't know if that is good or bad).

Speaking of Hermes: they came out with the Steve Bag a year or so ago and all I can say it is the softest leather that I've ever felt and I treated myself to a new jacket from there. There is nothing like the feel of a cashmere lining inside of a soft leather coat to make all of your wants and desires go away.  The bad thing about this year is that I had nothing to buy for that someone special.  I'm still waiting for him to walk through the door.  

That reminded me of a Neil Diamond song - remember this:

    

 You Don't Bring Me Flowers

 You Don't Sing Me Love Songs

 You Hardly Talk to me Anymore

 When I Come Through the Door at the End of the Day

 I Remember When...

You finish singing it - it only serves to depress me.  But as Chanukah ended tonight I began thinking back over the last couple of weeks and a few things stood out.

Today I got the results of Levi and Shlomo's trip to the vet.  Levi has a spine injury, just like his daddy (me)!  The poor baby is going to be on pills for the rest of his life and he will be looked after (I should say continued to be looked after) by a doggie neurologist.  I always thought that people were crazy who spent more money on their pets than they did for themselves in medical care, but truth be told: I love these two guys.  They are reminders of great times and a constant reminder that one day, soon I hope, I will be with someone who can serve as their other daddy.  If you can believe it - the two of them are also gaining weight too quickly.  In the last six months Shlomo went up 3 pounds and Levi went up 2.5 (or the other way around - I don't remember), but what I do know is that these two dingbats have now been placed on a diet by their doctor and we have to use diet treats and more walking.  I can help them with some of that because it is partly my fault.  I've been spending too much time by myself not worried about them - I need to focus on the important things.

Then there are the floors in my house.  I'm changing out the floors to some other kind of wood that my little brother is going to be in charge of making sure gets done.  How Johnny is going to do it is beyond me, but he tells me he will and he never lets me down.  Only problem here is that I cannot for the life of me figure out what I want to change to.  I know the theme/feel that I'm going for and it is a cross (if you have ever been) between the Four Seasons Beverly Hills and Shutters in Santa Monica.  Colors for Shutters and then furniture from the Four Seasons.  Every single time I've come close to getting the wood and pulling the trigger to buy it something says, but will it match this or that.  The sad thing here is that I've done what only a true narcissist can do and I decided to build the room around an accessory - an antique boat that I found in a little shop in La Jolla.  It is fantastic and not far from the new Brooks Brothers - a perennial favorite of mine.  It is like that Kohler commercial where the lady says "build a house around this" and then bangs a faucet on the desk.  Same thing here only mine is a boat - a big 5 foot long heavy wooden boat that I have no idea will match the furniture I've picked out from good old Ethan Allen.  Boy I sound like I'm getting old - and I am.  I'm closer to 40 than 30 and I just am starting to realize that I guess.  Next month is a milestone birthday for me - the balance will have swung and the closeness could not be more clear.

All in all it was a good holiday.  Took the dogs out most days to the park and whether it was Los Angeles or Rancho Santa Fe - they had a good time.  One day Levi, the little one, ran smack into an old man's Bentley.  Now I'm all for Bentleys don't get me wrong, but when the guy is 70 he needs to be in a sedan - not one of the cheap little Continental!  I know what it is to be in mid-life crisis - I think I'm in one, but come on.  Seventy is far too old for that.  To his credit the guy gave me his card in case the little guy was hurt, but still.  What should I get myself for my midlife crisis and am I already in one if my car cost more than his?  Or, is that just snobbery... hell if you added up the cars that I don't need, but have (everyone could do with just one), but I have one for dogs, one for me and one for distance.  That is a lot of cars - hell maybe I've already been in my midlife crisis and now am only figuring it out.

I'm also having this argument with myself over someone that left the radio station.  He keeps sending out little nasty drip drip drips of things he hated about his previous employer.  My question is if it was that bad why did you stay?  We all have disgruntled employees - Lord knows I have had them, but this guy is something else.  He gets a huge mailing list because of the person he worked for and now he's using that same mailing list for his own bar to bash people over the head with.  Forgive me, but there is something about loyalty that is just lacking in this world.

Speaking of which: can someone please tell me why someone would call my show and ask that I give the Palestinians equal time on a program run by a Jewish talk show host as if the story of the Palestinians was not getting out?  If I were captured by the Hamas in Gaza (Israel - not Palestine, there is no such place) - these people would chop off my head yet a caller of mine said - give them time on the radio because I'm fair and balanced.  Um, no I'm not.  I'm a talk show host - not a reporter.  I'm paid to have opinions; not paid not to have them.

Movies were a disappointment over the holidays.  One I really like with Tom Cruise lost to a dog - although Christmas is hardly the time to trot out the Nazis - someone get marketing in here quick - the scientologist has gone bonkers.  One movie I did watch was in Hebrew and, like at Eyal's house, I could only get every other or third word - I really have to go back to the basics on my Hebrew.  The movie is called Beaufort and it is based on the 2nd Lebanon War that was mishandled by the politicians of Israel.  My hope is that this move into Gaza by Israel will stop the 1 million Israelis who live within range of missiles from fearing doing everything from going to school or work; to enjoying themselves outside lest they be shot dead by an Hamas sniper.

Next week I will be talking about the big stories of 2008.  The AP put out their list and some of the national papers put out their own, but I have my own top 10ish (ish because it could be more and it could be less) stories of 2008.  That is still to come.  OH one more thing.

I am on Facebook - obviously since some of you came here from Facebook.  This guy tracked down what is supposed to be one of the most secret phone numbers a guy can have - one attached to a Vertu phone.  Out of the blue my phone starts ringing and since so few people have that private private number and it is a number I've had for a super long time that I don't use for the show or anything else - only personal stuff - I'm thinking - GREAT... someone made plans for New Years eve because with the holiday just ending I haven't.  Nope - it is someone from Facebook who said it took him some time, but he talked to someone who knew someone else who got my number.  How odd is that.  I felt like I need to post a sentry outside the house because I don't know if I have an enterprising new personal assistant at my fingertips OR if I have yet another stalker.  I hope it is not the latter and I could always use the former.

So to borrow a phrase from that icon of anorexic male fashion - Ryan Seacrest.  Yuhas Out.

Countdown to Chanukah & Christmas

It used to be exciting when people asked me what I wanted for this holiday or that.  I had a list - a long one - of all the things that I wanted, but now I think I've hit the year when asking me what I want is shrugged off with an "eh, nothing."  Eh NOTHING! What am I talking about?  

I want things - many things, but I just don't want other people to buy them for me.  When I want something I go out and get it - it is now better to give than to receive (dirty minds some of you - really) - and I'm sitting around thinking: what do I get for the people who work for me, what do I get for nieces and nephews and what do I get for the siblings?  Anything at all?  Oh what a quandary I find myself in.

For me I know what I want and that is to complete my wardrobe with all of the essentials of a well dressed man.  Details gave me the book and I've had a wonderful personal shopper who has been building my wardrobe for years.  Add to that a stylist and I can't help but look good - even though I'm much more comfortable in a Lacrosse shirt and jeans.  I should explain that looking good doesn't mean that I've become "more" handsome (that sounded vain) or anything like that; rather, it simply means that I'm better put together than I used to be.  Some say that the clothes make the man - and that could be true - but could it be that clothes don't really matter when it comes to the man and that I'm completely wasting my money?  Who knows.

Then comes the question about what I do for the holidays.  I'm off so don't have to talk to the masses - I like saying that.  But where do I go when the rest of the world is gathering to be together.  I'm actually looking to get away!  Do I go somewhere fantastic that I've been - like Nevis where the temperature right now is a beautiful 80 degrees with sun or do I do what I think I want to do and visit Europe and spend some time in the snow?  I hate the cold, but I do look good in cashmere and I have a great cashmere coat that I bought from Mr. Ferragamo a few weeks ago when I saw the temperature was going to drop into the 50s and going out in this coat is just a statement that I like to make.  Oh - that is not me in the picture (duh) - like I could be a model.

So the biggest questions for me are both selfish and non-selfish: do I do Europe or somewhere warm?  Do I base the vacation destination on my wardrobe and what I think I look 

good in or do I do a little bit of both?  These seem like super unimportant things, but I have three weeks to fill and when I fill them I want to make sure that I'm doing it right.  There is a place I want to visit again and that is Prague - I love Prague.  The last time I was there I was able to have a fantastic Queen Latifa time - remember that movie?  If you didn't you have to rent it - Last Holiday - she thinks that she's dying so she spends all of her money for a wonderful vacation and has the time of her life and realizes that she was not living at all.  Good film - not Oscar stuff, but the things that make you smile are seldom the things that make the people at the Academy smile.  Ever notice that?  Award season is right around the corner so I'm wondering about that too - who is in who is out.

My next vacation is going to be to Israel so it goes without saying that I'll go to Israel over the course of the next year - I do it so often that it is like a recurring appointment, but it has been quite some time since I've dropped everything and just jetted off to Europe or somewhere fun to order room service and relax.  That is my kind of vacation, but traveling is such a hassle.  I do have the Blue Star Jet thing that I could use, but I'm one of those guys that saves up my miles to use only in an emergency - like when I need a flight that I can't get on.  If you don't have a jet membership - I suggest it because it makes life easier and instead of sitting in an airport waiting to get somewhere (where the wait in the airport is longer than the flight itself) - I'm thinking - "save miles you may need them one day" - it is not like a hurricane is coming to southern CA, but if I used my miles on Blue Star I'm sure there would be an earthquake that I'd need to escape and a G5 can take off on a much shorter runway and American Express will always be there to help pay for it if need be.  Gosh, I love AMEX... they can do anything. 

The good news is that I've got my room for the "big night" and even have the car on reserve.  Now I just need to wait for my tickets to arrive - oh what will I be invited to?  I feel like I need a visit from the Ghost of Chanukah Future.  

Speaking of that - Dickens would be rolling in his anti-Semitic little grave if he saw the version of the Christmas Carol that me and some of my colleagues put on at our annual Christmas party yesterday.  Oh what a disaster, but it was fun.  I forgot how great this time of year could be because it has been so surrounded by tragedy over the last few.  First, a few years ago, came the death of a sister, then came yet more struggles with my back and this year I'm struggling, really struggling, with the death of a friend that I was not ever able to say a proper good-bye to.  Katie's story is below, but I think about it every single day.  I've also got "having fun" on my mind because sometimes I feel like having fun is a luxury that since some of my friends cannot have that I shouldn't have either. 

I used to worry about the issues that divide us - things like sexuality and income, and we had a really hard time coming up with what to do: do we go straight one night and gay the next or do we just do straight without any consideration of gay?  Do we go cheap or do we go more expensive and then I supplement the meal or activity for those who cannot afford it?  It is a delicate balance because you don't want people to feel bad that they cannot afford things, but at the same time I don't want to eat at Outback Steakhouse when I could be sitting at Ruth's Chris or Mortons (the latter is my favorite chain), BUT my favori

te steak in the whole wide world is Mastro's Steakhouse on Canon in B. Hills.  

There is nothing better when it comes to a steakhouse and I say anywhere that was good enough for Sinatra is good enough for me.  I say that a lot - good enough for X = good enough for me.  It is almost like I'm remembering David Hume from my days as an undergraduate so many years ago.  I did love philosophy class and I have to admit that I was damn good at it.  Good thing it is one of my majors.

Meanwhile, I sit at the precipice of a decision: to travel or not to travel; to be frugal or not to be frugal.  I'm probably going to end up doing the latter and I have over 300,000 British Airways frequent flyer miles to use before February (many of which I earned by using the Concorde when she was flying - boy that was an amazing plane, but 13 hours to London is such a long time once you've done it in just a few), but what can you do when you just don't know where you want to go?  I guess I could flip a coin, but do I really want to do that and risk not going to the right place OR do I just stay home for three weeks?  

I've never actually done that before.  I could shuttle between LA and Del Mar and play at the beach house and play in town for a few days at a time.  I'm also thinking - do I take the dogs there and back or do I leave them at the pet hotel?  I want to take them with me.  

They are such good boys and they keep me company.  I would miss them for almost a month.  With gas prices as low as they are I should really drive as much as possible and with more than 500 horse power I should definitely take advantage of them and drive as much as possible.

To hell with global warming - it snowed in Houston and New Orleans!  Talk to me about global warming when it actually starts to warm.

I would be remiss if I didn't talk about Chicago politics.  Not because I live in Chicago or even care about what is going on in IL, but I find it delicious when political scandals rock America.  They are fun - they are what I find almost as entertaining as Notre Dame football!  Well, not so much this year since USC beat them in my own backyard, but come

on - who doesn't love a scandal.  

We should have known that Governor Blagojevich was dirty (outside of the fact that he is out of Chicago politics) - good Lord look at his hair!  Far be it from me to talk about bad hair - I pay $6.50 for a haircut from Frank at the barber shop, but look at that.  There is something dirty about a man who has that much hair, is governor and cannot get someone, anyone, to help him with it.  

His chief of staff was willing to go to jail for him in order to sell a seat in the US Senate, they're bought anyway aren't they when it comes down to it, but he couldn't say to the guy - hey Guv - your hair can use some work.

THIS is just one of the many reasons that I do not find it unreasonable to have a Queer Eye episode for public servants.  Ever been to the DMV?  What are those people wearing.  Oh, and I've noticed this over the years too. 

WHY oh why are public servants (not the elected officials, but the people giving us our licenses and things like that) so fat?  Is there a rule that says you MUST go and eat your way through the day?  

I was getting my license plates from the DMV and the lady behind the counter (I needed new plates because for some reason I did not qualify for a mail in routine - don't ask me why).

So, I'm standing in line hoping that I do not get the lady who is munching on Cheetos - her fingers were

orange and she was just chewing in the most disgusting way.  I was watching as the Cheetos fell out of her mouth when she chewed and she just brushed whatever fell onto the forms of the people she was waiting on onto the floor.  

Of course, and almost out of spite, I was blessed to stand next to her.  There is nothing more disgusting to me than HEARING people eat.  It is fine for me to see it during lunch or something, but there are things that bother me: people biting their nails or, worse, their cuticles (hello: even a cheap manicure at a strip mall is only like $10 - get them done right) and then there is the sound of eating.  Oy gevalt I cannot tolerate that sound.

Anyway so after the Cheetos lady adjacent was finished with me I got my renewals in the mail and began to wonder - is it time for a new car already?  Do I need so many cars?  I mean I am no Jay Leno, but I like cars and this one has three stickers on the year thingy which means it is time for a new one.  So I go car shopping.  You'd think that car dealers were going out of business or something - oh wait - they are, but when I pulled up to the dealership to see if I wanted to take the next step into the next car I began thinking that I'm as unsure about the new car as I am about my Christmas vacation.  

Do I want a really super fast car, as opposed to the already fast car, that I'll never be able to open up on the freeway?  Do I want a gas guzzler because I feel better with a lot of car around me and do I want to continue not buying American?  The only one I can say with certainty is that I will never ever buy an American car so that is not a problem, but the rest of the questions are too difficult to answer so I go shopping for something easier - stuff.

Just stuff.  I fill my life with stuff and am empty on real things.  I know that sounds kind of backwards, but I'm thankful for the people in my life, and I hope they know that, but when it comes to stuff how much can one guy buy?  I need to be able to share my whole life with someone and it is driving me insane that I cannot do that with someone full time yet.  One day I will - at least I hope it is coming.  I'm closer to 40 than I am to 30 and even being in your "mid-30s" is supposed to be like your 20s, but for me there is no difference.  One guy at Jose Eber even asked me if I wanted to color the gray out of my hair.  Do I want to color the gray.

Maybe...

Damages is one of my favorite shows on TV AND SEASON 2 is coming - watch the Trailer... boy it is good.  I also forgot to mention that December 7th (also a Sunday - 67 years ago to the day) the Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor.  Wouldn't it be nice to have America just as dedicated to one another today as we were back then.  Thank you to the Greatest Generation.

My First Blog Diary Post - Long, but good.

I write a diary that is relatively private, but then I realized that I was starting to be like Dame Judy Dench in Notes on a Scandal (picture one obviously) - only prettier - like her in Bond (picture 2).  I'm not sure exactly what a Dame is, but if it means fabulous then the Queen - the English one, you know - Elizabeth II - not someone I met in West Hollywood, got it right.

When I'm writing in my little journal with my important stuff writing pen - it is a rather lucky pen inasmuch as I signed my first "deal" with it - that sounds very Hollywood right, but we all sign deals - I'm just a bit more superstitious about it I guess.  The pen is fantastic - a Montblanc (it is one word and I've never understood smart people who think that it is two) fountain pen called the Meisterstruck Platinum and yes, there is a picture for that too.

I see no reason not to have a lot of pictures when you write.  One of my journals has a bunch of 

pages of magazines and things cut out with stuff taped in - it truly was almost child-like, but it was the only way I knew how to remember what I wanted to say and I never wanted to forget the things that I knew.  

When I write about things that are person or important it is my belief that you should write in the way you either do or want to live and there is nothing better than the feel of ink on the finger.  That doesn't mean that I am a great writer - I'm far from that, but I want to make my journal mine and the only way to do that is to make things my way.  I'm sure a lot of people write better than I do about the things that are important to them, but it is my feeling that writing and cutting and pasting is so much a chore in this day and age of cut and paste that it actually caused me to want to stop writing and that would be insane to me.

This is the first time I'm writing in my journal since my little dog, Levi, had a medical problem and since Thanksgiving.  I intentionally put it off so that I could turn my daily writing into weekly writing and I let a couple days go afterwards simply out of time and to let things sink in.  Levi and Shlomo, his big brother from the same litter, are pugs and they are great dogs.  Levi is the smaller of the two and the vet has some scary things for me to be looking for in the little guy.  They both just turned three and they are rambunctious and fun.  The unconditional love I get from these two little dingbats is so worth the added time it takes me to get ready in the morning or coming home mid-day or in the middle of something to make sure that they are let out. 

I leave them at a pet hotel when I leave town or I take them with me.  Shlomo gets carsick, though, so there is really no middle ground with them.  

Either I take them with me and we stop every 20 minutes or I don't take them with me I end up having to say good-bye as they are taken into the pet hotel where normal people are not allowed to go.  It is a good place, don't get me wrong, but it is not home and I'm sure they miss it.  BUT - selfish as it may be - I love the feeling I get when I pick them up.  Here are the two of them in a shopping cart at Petco (at least I think it was Petco) - aren't they the most adorable dogs?  You will probably disagree if you have one, but I've seen some ugly dogs out there and nobody ever admits to them!

So the last week (give or take a day or two since this is my first entry on the blog that isn't).  Not a whole lot happened, really, given the boring life that I lead.  We had Thanksgiving and I got to see a friend or two for a day or two, but mostly I spent the last week or so doing not much of anything.  There is something about being "bone idle" as the Brits call it (why am I so in love with anything British: British movies, British actors, British TV, British monarchs - well not British food - fish and chips are fine, but thinking about "shepherds pie" makes me sick to my stomach and I can eat - I can eat just about anything.  You don't know that whole history, but I will update you slowly.

The long and the short of knowing that I can eat just about anything is the fact that I did.  After I left the military I was in a wheelchair - it was an awful time in my life (when you get hurt and you're on active duty there used to be little sympathy for the things going on in your head and the goal was to get you well).  I spent a ton of time sitting in a wheelchair, watching television and eating.  I went from a healthy fit active duty Marine to a fat blob who just happened to be in a wheelchair.  It could have been worse - I could have taken all of the pills that I got when I left the hospital and ended it all, but I didn't - don't ask me why, but I would have devastated at least one person, I'm not sure how many others would have cared, but at least one man would have cared and for him I will always be grateful.

Thankfully I am not in a wheelchair today.  It took a lot - years - of physical therapy and training, but I am almost back to my USMC weight.  Although, they had to cut through my stomach (I've had 7 operations on my spine) to get to my back after surgery 3 so I'll never have abs of steel again.  I figure there are enough men with them that I don't have to worry about that.  If it were not for my doctors and nurses I would be a mess - so thank you medical people out there!  

My first real boyfriend was special, but he left me and in some ways I don't blame him (his name was Chris), but in many ways I do because how hard is it, really, to break up with someone?  In my view - not hard at all.  Especially when you're gay and there is a world changing event taking place in life.  I would have understood - I have to find a picture of him so that I can show you.

ANYWAY (see - I told you that I ramble) - back to Thanksgiving week.  I decided to leave the comfort of one place and head to the comfort of another.  Put this in perspective: my friend, Sunil, was going to India to be with his family and that is when the attacks in India happened.  He was going to put up in London for a few days anyway and I got an email from him the other day that he was in Turkey - Istanbul to be exact.  I'm sure it was fantastic - I hope he took a lot of pictures!

Being in Los Angeles is one of the best things in the world and to use a landmark for my location (see that Four Seasons over there - I'm right there by it) I'll use something that you can find on Google so that you can put a place to the me.  But before I get ahead of myself I was hoping that I would see a certain someone during Thanksgiving (since I'm a "public figure" and lack privacy anyway I think I will keep a bit of privacy here by not mentioning a bunch of names that you could easily report back - unless I'm the only reader of my diary in which case name will not be a problem).  If you know where the Four Seasons is at on Doheny then you are close to where I am (plus or minus a mile or so).

Meanwhile - I choose to spend some time away from home, but only after I have Thanksgiving dinner with my brother and sister-in-law.  I've never understood the "in-law" technicality attached to someone that your brother or sister marries.  In my family that is a hell of a lot of people since everyone seems to have found love (with the exception of a couple of us).  

LA is where we did Thanksgiving and I had it with my brother, Johnny, and his wife, Dr. Danielle.  I say Dr. Danielle because I lack any title at all anymore and figure if someone has one you should use it.  So I do.  Here we are just about to go eat - if you look closely you'll notice that the picture attached to this blog of me is taken in the same chair - IT WAS THE PRACTICE PICTURE because we only had 10 seconds from the time we clicked the button until the time that we took the photo.  

This is not all of them - we went through a lot of pictures to get to where we were going, but this is one of many.  I should have taken pictures of the best part of the meal too - the potato bar!  Mashed potatoes and truffles were "the bomb" (forgive my rapperness), but they were.

What did we talk about?  Well, we talked about how lonely I am, we talked about how strange my brother is (the one who was with us) because he has the uncanny ability to remember things that did not happen when we were kids - not to be rude to my little brother, but he is 26 and I've got a decade on him so I'm pretty certain that I know what did and did not happen when we were kids - I did leave home just after turning 17 so I have no clue what he is talking about half of the time.  Of course, I joined the military shortly after that and it was the best decision I ever made.  

I would be a complete ass (or worse) if I didn't join our Armed Forces and I am so happy that I did because it gave me the foundations in life that I needed to be a good man (notice I didn't say perfect or use any of those great gay modifiers like VGL) and is giving me all that I need to become a better one.  One day I will be the man that I want to be, but I'm not exactly sure what that kind of man is or even who that man is (or what that man does), but I'm on my way to figuring all of that out.

After Turkey Day I went to the beach house - it is an escape.  It is in a great little city called Del Mar (you'd like Del Mar - well everyone likes Del Mar) and since the weekend was only going to be interrupted by working one day on the air I really had nothing to worry about.  

WAIT!  I forgot one of the most important things that happened during Thanksgiving.  I met up with Eyal, his boyfriend and his sister, Donna.  She's always been beautiful and we've been at the same Oscar events and things that all "young" Hollywood does, but to call her beautiful is to understate what she is - she is phenomenal as a person and as a model.  Here we are at the Grand Luxe Cafe next to the Beverly Center - now you have to understand that I just had a derm-abrasion about two hours before this from Gladys (more on that in a second), but here are the four of us - Eyal is the tallest, his bf is the 2nd tallest and obviously Donna is the model - she always looks like a model.  

AND JUST SO YOU KNOW - EYAL IS THE TALLEST AT 6'7" TALL so it is not like I'm underdeveloped or that guy Vern from Dr. Evil fame - it is just that everyone that was around me had big bones.  

To be even more generous - Donna was wearing really big boots - it was freezing that day in LA - I think the high was about 70 so at that time of the day it was probably only in the 60s.

Back real fast to why I look like an idiot: first I was talking when we had an Asian guy take our picture (I thought it was their thing to take perfect pictures - obviously he didn't wait until I was done talking in order to take it), but that said - there are others, but not with all four of us in it.  

The one I have with just Eyal and I is great and I will keep it private, but as far pictures go - the only thing that made me look small was the fact that they are so tall.

NOW to why I'm as red as a tomato.  Earlier that day (this was the day after Thanksgiving and before I went to see Hunky Santa at the Beverly Center - not kidding - oh you think I am... well here he is - PS: he is the guy in the hat).  Anyway - before I had lunch with Eyal, Donna and Brenden I went to see Gladys and Rosa at Jose Eber.  

As you can probably tell from my haircut - I still go to the PX for it and spend a total of $6.50 for a haircut every week.  BUT, when it comes to my face and nails (hands and feet) - I feel like I have to stave off getting old (or at least looking old) so I spend an awful lot of money on things that most men in LA find perfectly normal, but not so much in the middle of the country.  

Early in the day - just hours as a matter of fact - I had a derm-abrasion appointment with Gladys and then I had my mani/pedi with Rosa.  Gladys works wonders and she has always been a great lady - I think I've been going to her for my face for the last - oh - eight years or so.  Rosa is a little more new - not to doing nails mind you - she was doing Liz Taylor's nails when I was a baby, BUT I had a lady named Holly before I went to Rosa because Holly moved to 

Christoph (I think that is where she went) and I stayed at Jose's place.  

It is a great salon and had I known we were going to take pictures at lunch I would have been sure NOT to do much more than my typical facial that gets rid of the bad and is on with the good.  But, alas, lunch came out of the blue because we all just happened to be available and eating with Eyal and Donna was something too good to pass up and meeting Brenden was even more special because Eyal is a beautiful person who I think deserves a wonderful man.  So I had to check it out - this was my first time meeting him.  We had a great debate over all things wonderful (and political) - Brenden is a great liberal and I'm a great conservative.  Eyal and Donna just sort of sat there and cheered on whomever they thought was right at the time and we all decided that we had to do a Shabbat dinner together because a good Jewish dinner cannot go without a good argument!

Meanwhile, after lunch was over I decided it was time to head to the beach to spend some away time in a place where I find solace and lonliness, but a strong sense of calm - my beach place is not huge or ornate; rather, it is a small little place where I can smell the sea and think.  You see, a few weeks ago I (and many others) lost a good friend of mine (ours) - a wonderful girl named Katie about a month earlier and I wanted to go look through some pictures.  When I opened the photo album I realized that it was the final time I would be able to look at those pictures.  I hadn't cried in a very long time, but when I was contacted out of the blue from a mutual friend of ours - JT - after I went off the air one Thursday night I knew something was wrong and I knew that if something was wrong and he was contacting me instead of Katie that it had to be something about Katie.  

When I heard that she died my heart sank, think was a couple weeks prior, and now was time for me to look at the pictures of us as we followed Neil Diamond around the world on what ended up being a trip to rival all others.  As relaxing as it is in Del Mar - no distractions and nothing to take my mind off of what I need - I found myself just laying on the bed wondering why?  What happened to Katie? Then I realized that I didn't want to know.  She died the way she lived - LIVING and I am extremely jealous.

This was not the first time that death came early to people that I knew - I was in the military and when one of the guys I knew quite well died in Iraq (I've since seen four others come home in coffins) I was shocked.  That was the first death from this war that really hit me hard - not because it was a death; rather, because I knew that it would be spun.  Trevor was the poster-Marine.  A Marine's Marine. Everything about him was good and he was a fantastic person.  I'd not seen him since he PCS'd, but when I learned he was dead I knew it would be a big deal.  He was the guy that all of you saw on posters and in advertisments for the USMC.  You'll recognize him.  

Katie's death was different because it was not expected - not that you expect people to die when they go to war - most people come home just fine.  Katie hit me like a ton of bricks and I wasn't sure how to process it - still don't.

Okay - this has gone WAY too long and I'm not even done with the week yet because I ended up back in LA doing exactly what I didn't want to end up doing (clubbing), but with friends and with people that you hardly know who become more than friends you end up doing the nuttiest things.  I will have to finish this after I watch something Christmassy.  I'm thinking Home Alone.  I do love that movie.